Dear DMV,

Thank you for your timely notice that my license will expire. I do appreciate you giving me 6 weeks to complete the process before it actually expires. ((I do, however, feel this will not be enough time.)) I also appreciate that most of your services are now offered online. That is very handy, especially since no one likes to go to the DMV in person.

Here, however, is my quandary. I did miraculously receive the notification. You must have sent it to Cocowalk Lane, VA Beach, which in turn, forwarded it to Japan, who also forwarded it to California. The paperwork states my new license will be mailed to the address on my license. Problem one: I definitely no longer live there. Solution: update my address. In order to do that, I need a pin number. In order to get a pin number, you will mail it to my address of record. Which will get forwarded two or three times....

Ugh. This is why no one likes you, DMV.